Directions
to the doctor's office include, "Take a left when you
enter the trailer park."
When you enter the office, you see a dispenser with the
sign "PLEASE TAKE A NUMBER".
Tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles.
The only psychiatrist, in the plan, is nicknamed "Joe
the bartender".
The only item listed under Preventive Care feature of
coverage is "An apple a day".
Your "primary care physician" is wearing pants
you gave to Goodwill, last month.
"Patient responsible for 200% of out-of-network
charges" is not a misprint.
The only expense covered 100% is embalming.
Your pills come in different colors, with "M" on
them.
And the number one sign you've joined a cheap HMO....
Your prescription for anti-depressant medication: A coupon
for a double espresso at Starbucks.
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